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Ashes to PhoenixHonor student, writer
Letter my life in calligraphic scriptures
And leave me to myself.
Now I am a worker bee
Oh, a member of society
So far from what I used to be
So far away from you.
She likes to dance, likes to be stationary
Likes to keep away from me
She broke my heart, before the spring set in
Before I could catch my breath.
Look how far I've come
Baby, covered in oil and grime
Ashes to ashes, shit to shit
Ashes to phoenix
I cleaned myself
With your amber, lavender, vegan soap
And came out smelling like a dump.
"Every rose has its
Sewing needles, scissors, ball point pens:
Is my sanity.
Bar shaped shadows
Dance across my bed like
Would if I were anyplace else.
And all I ever want to do is
Sleep but everything keeps moving by
At the speed of light and I can't swallow my own spit anymore
Without it tasting like someone else's.
Must be all the pills they've got me on...
Shouts back contradictions when I think
So I don't think much anymore.
Butter knives and paper cranes;
All the things that they won't let me have...
As I dream of oblivion from this cracker-box paper cell.
Bottled UpDon't look at me,
With lying, glossy eyes
Don't pull my heart strings
Until you've ripped out every seam
why don't you hear me scream
and see me cry?
You cradle every fragile wound
You play along with every game
without you I would never be the same
You're a bum, and you are perfect.
Imperfectly, ignoring me
Forgetting that I've lost my way
And trying, always, to comfort me.
I can't see that you're perfect.
too young to be so cynical,
too old to make-believe
too much of an emotional
to sew back up these broken seams [can you do it for me?]
A cliche, fickle drama queen.
[you cradle every shallow wound,
but miss all the inf
Friends Until TomorrowWe are
For a moment
Inseperatable until we go our seperate ways
At the end of each exultant day.
Will you support me for
That flashes by like headlights
On an ague, langiud night?
Or whenever it's convenient
For our ever-busy lives
Where every moment is a lie.
The Reason I am Breathing"You are lost
And I am losing
Can you feel the crystal raindrops
Are you desensitized?
I can see the light!
How bright it shines
Oh, almost blinding,
It came too late.
Please don't turn your back
On your convictions, on your friends,
And on your dreams.
Please don't lose it all
Don't lose control like I did
I beg of you
Don't say that it's too late
For you to feel the rain
And see the light
Don't say that it's too late
Like I did."
We're getting married today
The ones who cry out "Your mistake!"
Huddle up together on one side
The ones who held my hand
Stand to my right
The sun is shining, music plays
and I am suffocating
On your open-eyed affection!
On our matching platinum rings
And on this light.
I found the note this morning,
It was crinkled by her palm
It was meaningless to me
Because I hold my friends and my convictions
Close like death
And I can feel the crystal ra
To Hell With HappinessSenseless treason
What's the reason for this blatancy
I can still be all that I want to be
Without wearing a banner, a decree
Then everyone would copy me.
Shh, keep your loved ones close
And all your secrets closer
Keep your soul contained within
One hollow flask
To hell with Lovers!
And to hell with all Best Friends
Who needs companions
On this bumpy, one-lane path
Of lost convictions to the past
Alone at last.
UntitledA bloody mess in the room
Oops I'm sorry
I killed the groom
Sobs and cries everywhere
I smile happily
And loves the despair
Somber faces on the field
Smirk upon my victory
Broken hearts won't be healed
Stroke the frills of her dress
The white now turned crimson with my work
One more life made less...
The place where they were to be married
The caskets were laid
Soon to be buried...
GoneI walk down the steps
I see all the marks I know that there gone
I know I cannot help
I sit on the floor looking round I see where they lay
I see all around and I watch all the blood dripping down.
The Great ThiefMy empty gaze
and bony smile
these features of mine
will leave you as pale
as my accursed face
Shrouded am I
in black robes
and dark intent
and like a thief in the night
I come to steal you away
Tears may fall at my theft
but I could care less
After all I've been doing this
Since the beginning
And I don't see an end to my thievery
Many have tried
but all have failed
to escape my grasp
Little do you know
that my reach knows no bounds
No matter how far you run
No matter where you hide
I will find you
and I will steal you away
to my realm of Peace and Darkness
To fight me
is to fight Fate
But please do continue
To fight me,
'cause it's no fun if you just let me take you.
You can hear the sky ringing, ringing with the sounds of war
The ground has turned to ash, cinders left behind by these fucking monkeys
Monkeys and their petty quarrels
You can feel, you hear the sound of burning
A world destroyed by a race who was left behind to care for it
Humans and their ridiculous fighting, the never ending fighting
The ghosts take you into the space betwixt spaces, and you can see all
You begin to live vicariously, watching through the eyes of another
And when one pair of eyes goes dark, you find another
And like this, you witness the fall of empires
The destruction of nations
The end of all
You watch as society collapses and rots
You watch as worms devour all
And the snakes start to sing
CasketSkin that splinters by day and burns by night,
Shaking in the corner where wailing voices echo,
Itching the skin until blood spills,
Will it ever ease the tension?
Skin that trembles by day and shudders by night,
Vomiting in the corner where crows shrieking echoes,
Coughing until blood reaches the throat,
Will it ever ease the agony?
Bloodlust.This world is merciless,
Cruel, unforgiving, and worthless.
But at the same time the world is amazing,
Wonderful, forgiving, and breath taking.
The cruel is what I see almost all the time,
The breath taking side is so rare its almost a crime,
People bully and hurt others for fun,
When you're in the corner and covered in their tall shadows its hard to see the sun.
What doesn't make sense is the innocents are always afraid of these people,
What makes even less sense is they believe the things that turn out to be so evil,
I hope the people who call them names and push them down know that they might be alone,
I hope they know that those mean bullies make them feel like they have no one to turn too, that they're on their own,
I think that the people who get hurt don't stand up for themselves because they're afraid,
Its weird how someone can be afraid of a peer yet not be afraid of a blade,
Sometimes I wonder why other people bully the innocents why the make them go through so much pain,
Eyes of the NightEyes of the Night
Common people mutter that the night has eyes
They never know whose eyes those are
Or what they see
The dimensions of vision may differ from theirs
But nobody knows what that might be
Creatures of the night always look at our world differently
We who are living see from the light
The creatures of darkness see from the darkness of the night
Pupils glow like the eyes of the cat
They dart to and fro as though watching us pass
Then they hide with the first signs of morning light
To await the falling of another night
Colours of DepressionWhite as blinded,
Red like hellfire,
Crimson like blood,
Orange like fire,
Grey as clouded,
Yellow as faded...
Green like conspire,
Blue as flooded,
Purple as haunted,
Black has shrouded...
Whispers in the DarknessWhispers in the Dark*
This night has stirred
It is not as quiet as I thought
In the distance ahead
There came a voice
A whisper in the darkness
It said, "The Old Ones were.
The Old Ones are.
The Old Ones shall be."
Whose voice it is I know not
Nor do I care to know.
Some things are best
When left unknown.
*The Whisperer in the Darkness, Nyarlathotep, by H P Lovecraft
Suffocate MeSuffocate me,
Strangle out these memories
I'd bleed myself away for you
If only you'd help me to forget
All of my dead-end happiness
From days and weeks and months ago, still lingering: a shadow.
Like an unacheivable dream
I see you offering your phantom hand to me
Always just far enough away
That I can never reach it.
All of our hatred and our rage
Boils us down to meatless skin and bones
Until we're begging to be saved
From our own pointless self destructions.
My mind is a prison and a gift
If only I didn't feel so worthless
Then the echos that bounce off these prison walls
Could make me smile and love again
Instead of wishing I could end this.
So just suffocate me,
Choke out all my pent-up tears
And kill me off
So when I wake again
These memories will really be gone
And not simply repressed or stored away,
Waiting for another day
To show me all the disasters that have made me
Whoever it is I have become.
I want to murder myself
So that I can be someone else
five hour energyi suppose
last week was only an aftershock
of the earthquake you were before.
this place used to vibrate
with metal strings and melodic,
testimonies to life,
emitting coffee-scented moods
and the burn of it too.
i had memorized the
sounds of silence,
i couldn't help but relish it.
no longer had i known
the sounds of folk
and scent of mocha-
you became nothing more
than an echo of the laughter
i so desperately needed to hear again.
then the echoes got louder,
bouncing ferociously off the walls
to be made manifest
i walked into your room
expecting exactly what i found-
an unmade bed,
and an empty beer
(the one that you insisted you needed
just days ago).
i pressed my nose
into the pillow
for incense and cologne and starbucks
to penetrate my mind
and thinking fervently
i already know
what a clean sheet smells like."
how strong an aftershock can be,
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More